Monday, December 5, 2011

Frustrating ...

For the past few hours, I've been wondering if I should even write this post. Sometimes it's better to just let things be, but sometimes it's hard. No one likes having salt rubbed into their wounds. But, having said that ...

I lost a friend on Facebook today over a sarcastic status I wrote. It was tongue-in-cheek and I didn't mean for it to be taken the wrong way. I simply said, "Is it bad that I snicker at the thought of the USPS having lay-offs?" The first person who responded laughed and said yes, so I quickly added more to explain that I have family who works for the postal service. In other words -- it was a JOKE -- not that I was wishing it on any person.

My snide remark was about the ladies who work for the post office where I live. Now, they've always been nice to me, so I've never had a problem. However, every single time my husband or daughters go in, those ladies are mean to them. If you knew my girls, you'd know how quiet and polite they are, so they don't do anything to instigate this. We have never figured out why they treat them so poorly. By that, I mean they are rude, short-tempered, condescending  and often try to belittle them for doing something wrong. It's gotten so bad that they despise having to mail a package. Rick would rather I cut off his arm than make him go in. It's not just my family either. I've witnessed them acting this way with other customers as well.

So, I made a sarcastic comment. Some laughed, some said they have the same experience, and others said their post office is great. One person, however, said I was being mean, especially in this economy. Just as I was getting ready to reply to her directly, I noticed she had unfriended me. Seriously? Over something like that? I guess I'm too sensitive, so I sent her an email apologizing that I offended her. She never replied back.

Mind you, she wasn't a close friend. Actually, I didn't know her all that well. However, she is a writer and like many others, I like supporting their writing efforts just as they support mine. Obviously, she was upset and wanted nothing more to do with me. Now, I've unfriended people too, and probably more just recently. When I do, it's usually because they're posting something very hateful -- like hatred over the police. I know not everyone likes the cops, but I come from a law enforcement family.

I consider myself pretty tolerant when it comes to most things. Many of my online friends use Facebook as a political soapbox, which is fine. Nine times out of ten I probably don't agree with what's posted, but again, that's fine. If something is especially offensive, I have the option of not reading it, or even hiding it if I want. But if something is truly upsetting me -- like a lot of these anti-police videos and stories going around -- I might go to the extreme of unfriending someone. But that's a big might. Friends can still disagree.

I know I'm way too sensitive. I deleted the thread because I didn't want to upset anyone else. I wasn't saying I wished the lay-offs would happen. It was just a snarky comment in light of the mean ladies my family has to deal with. I don't think it was worth losing a friend over, but she obviously felt so. If I unfriended everyone who posted something I didn't like -- I'd be in the negative! People post pictures of abused animals, domestic violence victims, profanity, crude humor, erotic materials. I try to let most of those slide, and if I don't like them, I hide them. When it comes to hate -- like a video pleading with wives and children of law enforcement officers to take their weapons away so they can't beat up on the OWS people -- that's not my cup of tea. I don't hate anyone, but maybe I'm just not as tolerate of people like that. Unless you're in law enforcement, it's really hard to understand.

You know, I don't know why I let this bother me. This particular person has posted a lot of anti-police articles and I didn't flip out over them. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I guess what it boils down to is that my friendship to her wasn't worth that one catty remark. And if you think about it, that's really kind of sad.


  1. Well, for what it's worth, I didn't think it was that catty of a comment. And realistically, it's about freaking TIME the USPS did SOMETHING because they are losing money and not always known for awesome customer service, so there you go.
    I've heard a lot of people remark on the hating that goes on on Facebook. I recently got on and haven't seen much. I've been very selective 'friending,' however and when something doesn't interest me (like one woman's incessant updates on her kids), I just ignore it and move on.
    Online can be a tough place because there isn't much 2-sided dialogue, nor opportunity for people to have a clear sense of tone, which is more obvious when one is talking in person or knows someone in person.

  2. It can be frustrating when people take what we say the wrong way! Sorry that happened to you.

  3. GG: I KNOW you're talking about me with my incessant updates on my kids ;)

    Just joshing.

    Rena: I almost NEVER agree with my husband. If I "unfriended" him every time we disagreed, we'd never have gotten married and definitely wouldn't have stayed together 32 years :)

  4. Wow, every time I even start to think that maybe I'll join FB someday, I hear about something that puts me off yet again. When I publish next, I'll probably take the plunge, but until then, I have enough other ways to keep up with family and friends, which seems the whole point of FB anyway. For keeping up with the industry, I'm fonder of blogging, Twitter, message boards, even Google +.

    FWIW, I usually send my husband to the PO, and he doesn't have the best customer service stories either. But then, a government monopoly has never had to. Really, it's not a lot different at the DMV. This is why I'm leery of handing too many services over to the government.

  5. I did not see your comment, but I doubt it was very bad also, they can fire my mail carrier any time they want rude SOB